#LOVEISLOUDER ACTION CENTER

DEALING WITH DISAPPOINTMENT

Feeling guilty about feeling bad only makes things worse. 

Canceling events and staying home is the right thing to do right now. It’s a selfless act and a way of showing kindness to our communities. That doesn’t mean it feels good. In fact, it kinda sucks…especially if the event was something we were really looking forward to. Whether it’s a concert, graduation or a wedding you’ve been planning for months, the disappointment can be intense.
 
 
We’ve heard members of our community say they feel bad for feeling disappointed or sad when so many other people are struggling with health or financial issues. But here’s the reality — feeling guilty about feeling bad only makes things worse, and denying ourselves those feelings can make it hard to move past it.
 
 
Here are some quick tips for dealing with disappointment:
 
  • Acknowledge the Feelings. It’s ok and normal to feel disappointed. Accept that and talk to someone about if you can. Friends and family will most likely get it and they may have their own disappointments they want to express.
  • Forgive Yourself ASAP. So you threw a tantrum in the middle of a pandemic? You aren’t the only one who has had big reactions right now. It’s completely understandable to be bummed, so give yourself a break. Maybe you’ll even find a way to laugh about it (humor is critical in times like these).
  • Focus on Friends. One of the best ways to get out of our own heads, is to help other people. Do you have other friends or family members who have had to cancel events or special occasions? Reach out to them to say “Hey, I know you were looking forward to that event and I can imagine you’re bummed. I feel you. Let me know if you want to talk about.”
  • Have a Virtual Experience. Instead of sitting home on the day or night of the canceled event trying not to think about it, plan another activity. Have a Zoom dance party. Check out one of the virtual concerts and events happening daily. 
  • Make a Gratitude List. Feeling grateful when we’re bummed or pissed isn’t always easy, but it helps. So grab a piece of paper and start making a list of things you appreciate, big or small. Whenever you feel the disappointment start creeping back in, pull out the list and reread it or add to it.